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NVC Resources on Judgment

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  1. Setting Intentions with Attention

    Setting Intentions with Attention

    Kristin Masters

    Video · 8 minutes · 01/20/2025

    Kristin Masters explores how to approach goal-setting and self-reflection with compassion and mindfulness grounded in NVC principles. She encourages you to examine how conscious choice plays a role in how we treat ourselves and others.

  2. The Spiritual Path of NVC

    The Spiritual Path of NVC

    (2 Session Course)

    Robert Gonzales, Leo Sofer

    Multi-session Course · 2 hours, 10 minutes · 7/1/2015

    Are you a spiritual seeker who longs for an approach that supports compassion for self as well as profound spiritual transformation? If so, you’ll enjoy this telecourse recording with Robert Gonzales and Leo Sofer as they engage in dynamic discussions about NVC as a spiritual practice.

  3. In this 6-session course Sarah Peyton will take you through the 5 levels of unconscious contracts that can create patterns of self-sabotage and self-defeat. Each session introduces a different unconscious contract based on various aspects of relational neuroscience and provides support for the release of these contracts. 

    Sarah Peyton shows you how, with deep empathy, self-accompaniment, and an understanding of neuroscience, you can free yourself from your original constraints. 

    It can be bewildering to be human.

    We can make so many choices that are not good for us. Why do we persist in habits, incapacities or self-judgments that are harmful to our long-term well-being? 

    The answer to this question is surprising – it is usually either love – or - paradoxically, survival!

    Love is at the root of self-sabotage.

    Though we often aren't aware of it, our nervous systems are essentially still paired with our earliest caregivers and often related to how we responded as a child. Our first interactions shape us in ways that can limit our life energy.

  4. Giving feedback can be a difficult task, sometimes we try to avoid getting to the point and instead end up spending a long time attempting to communicate. We find there are mostly two types of feedback. The first focuses on what is wrong with the person's behaviour and tends to feel more judgemental whereas the second is values-based feedback, focusing on the needs of the people involved.

  5. This chart is intended as an aid to translating words that are often confused with feelings. These words imply that someone is doing something to you and generally connote wrongness or blame. To use this list, when somebody says “I’m feeling rejected,” you might translate this as: “Are you feeling scared because you have a need for inclusion?”
  6. Working With Our Mixed “Yes”

    Working With Our Mixed “Yes”

    Inbal Kashtan, Miki Kashtan

    Practice Exercises · 1 - 2 minutes · 3/29/2022

    For this exercise choose a situation in which you have said a “yes” to someone‛s request but you didn't experience your “yes” as given freely or joyfully. Then explore judgements, feelings, needs, and alternate strategies that come up in relation to your “yes”, your “no”, and in relation to what the other person might be experiencing.

  7. Working With Others' Mixed “Yes”

    Working With Others' Mixed “Yes”

    Inbal Kashtan, Miki Kashtan

    Practice Exercises · 1 - 3 minutes · 5/21/2024

    In this exercise choose a situation in which you got a “yes” to your request but you are not confident that it was agreed to freely or joyfully. Then explore your response to their “yes”, and possible unexpressed "no", with related observations, judgements, feelings, needs, requests, and alternate strategies that come up.

  8. What are the most powerful things I can do to build an inspired relationship? I answered the question with romantic relationships in mind; however, I believe the answer below applies to all important relationships.

  9. Empathizing with Someone Who is Silent

    Empathizing with Someone Who is Silent

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 7/4/2019

    Trainer Tip: When someone is unresponsive it can be an opportunity to bring in more presence and connection through empathy. They may be worried that if they speak they'll say something they'll regret. Or they may want to know that their needs matters as much as yours. They may also need more space to clarify their thoughts.

  10. Expressing Ourselves Honestly

    Expressing Ourselves Honestly

    Mary Mackenzie

    Trainer Tips · 1 - 2 minutes · 8/28/2019

    Trainer Tip: Be aware of opportunities to be honest holding the intention to connect with people. If you do this with the elements of brevity, directness, and respect, you can increase your chances of being heard. If they don't like your honesty, consider switching to empathizing with them by listening to their feelings and needs.

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