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Less than 2 weeks ago from the time I’m writing this letter, Hamas militants crossed from Gaza into Israel and killed more than 1,300 people, most of them civilians. Israel then retaliated and killed over 3,000 Gazans, most of them civilians. The death rate continues to increase every day.  

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October always makes me think about Marshall Rosenberg, the founder of Nonviolent Communication. He was born October 6, 1934. If he were still alive today (he died February 7, 2015), he would be 89 years old!

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Mary Mackenzie dives into the heart of change with an explanation of the 3 Phases of Transition. We have all experienced changes in our families, communities, work, and the world. How is it impacting you? How are you coping? Learn about the 3 Phases of Transition: the ending, the neutral zone, and the new beginning— and how this process can support you in navigating change.

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Sophie Docker shares how, through dialogue, we can start developing more consciousness, skills, and capacity for embracing conflict as a way to move beyond separateness and restore our interdependence. The way we engage with conflict can support us in finding our way to interdependence.

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The season is changing. What have you done to nurture yourself these past several months? It has been summer in my part of the world and moving into fall. 

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I ended last month’s Growing Roots letter with a question to you: “Do you remember that you are a gift?” I hope you had moments throughout July that reminded you of this! I am still thinking about it, actually.

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Roxy Manning shares some strategies to support a child's natural curiosity when asking questions about physical differences using NVC skills.

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Sarah Peyton uses Brene Brown's definition of vulnerability and expands to offer additional precision in her own definition. She explores the concept of vulnerability and its relation to the instrumental brain.

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Mary's Letter

2 Minutes

I want to report that after writing last month’s Growing Roots letter, I did indeed employ my tried-and-true method of moving past inertia: First step time limits. In doing so, I  made progress on planting my vegetable garden.

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Overriding our individual or collective capacities can sustain oppressive systems. Honoring limits better aligns with life and is more likely to dismantle patriarchal culture. Accepting, respecting and staying within capacity instead of constantly pushing beyond limits allows for increased individual and collective capacity -- this can lead to more sustainable agreements and a shift towards a more interdependent, gifting paradigm.

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Last year, I planted my vegetable garden in February. It was an enormous amount of work to get it ready. This year, we decided to move the garden farther away from trees (to avoid the ongoing tree root issue and allow more sun). So, we created 4 new beds. Now, they are ready to be planted, and yet… forward momentum has stalled.

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The purpose of setting boundaries is to prevent harm to yourself and others. In this video, Yvette Erasmus describes how and why exquisite self-care requires exquisite boundaries.

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I am writing to you with CELEBRATION on my mind. The NVC Academy has launched its new and improved website!! If you have not checked it out yet, please do so now: https://nvcacademy.com.

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Recently, I have been pondering anger, how I express it and the jackal story I tell myself about it. Marshall Rosenberg taught that anger is a natural emotion that is based on a judgment of someone else or myself. I agree with this, so I have been doing some “enemy images” and self-empathy work (and praying for those who are most likely to be the recipients of my anger). My goal was to clear my judgments and take responsibility for my “stuff.” It has helped a lot, and yet I still feel a general anger in me that is not directly related to anyone or any specific situation.

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